Not as Easy as It Looks

This is just the mindless ramblings of a college graduate (double major in political science and criminal justice) and her attempts to join the United States military. You better start here...

31 December 2005

Holy Shit

Wow...my blog is on milblogging.com...

Hah...I rock...Apparently...

Check me out...haha...how'd I get there?

So Cliched


Don’t blame the mirror for an ugly face.
(I don't know where this is from...my friend had it up on MSN Messenger, and I loved it! And Yahoo is not cooperating with me to find out where it's from.)


So, yeah, I am so fucked right now. No, not fucked UP. Fucked. Screwed. In major, big time trouble (Okay, not major, big time, but could be!). Let's just say I weighed myself this morning, and I swear the scale told me to get off, I was hurting it. So. Yeah. I SUCK. Fuckin' A! I might not hafta worry about my reno coming through if I can't get rid of this weight, dammit. My friend was like, "Uh, someone is trying to tell you something!" She, among with a lot of others do not want me leaving at all. What the fuck do they expect me to do? Stay in Midland, working at Smitty's the rest of my life!? Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but I don't get a)enough hours or b)enough money to live off of. Plus, there is nothing to do in this town (as evidenced by me even WRITING THIS ON NEW YEAR'S EVE!) and staying here would be a sure-fire way to drive myself insane.

Anyway. New Year's Eve. This is such a bullshit 'holiday.' I was talking to one of the members at the gym yesterday and he basically shared the same sentiment. He said, "There's so much pressure for you to do something COOL on New Year's Eve. And if you don't, you're a loser!" This was after I told him I was most likely sleeping my New Year's Eve away and he didn't make some comment about me being lame or stupid or anything like that. Then this other member walked in and we asked him what he was doing. "Uh, sleeping?" Haha! VINDICATION IS MINE! I AM NOT THE ONLY LOSER IN MIDLAND! =)

...there really was a point in mentioning New Year's Eve and all that shit. As you probably are well aware, this is the time of resolutions and changes in people's lives. I was reading a great article ("Iron John: Free Will & Free Weights" by Dan John) about will power and all that good stuff. The author, Dan John, mentions how there are basically ways in which one can better achieve his/her goals (he's actually talking about freeing up one's free will, but that's a concept you're going to hafta read the article to fully grasp). First, you've got to find someway to create the best environment to acheive those goals. Second, TELL EVERYONE. Make yourself accountable to what you've promised. Lastly, downsize your life. He uses the example of the guy who bitches about not having enough time to train, but in the next breath, can spout off the plots for all the latest television hits. Find what's important and get rid of what's not. Anyway, concept #2 is not something foreign to me (if you remember, I posted entries about my goals because I thought that would make me accountable for reaching them. I was wrong. Dead wrong). So, I figured I'm going to post my "resolutions" although I prefer the term "goals" because goals, to me, are something I am capable of acheiving if given the right circumstances and tools to do so. However...as I type this, I realize that because of the unknown nature of what next year will bring, I can't really set goals that might be achievable. For example, I would love to run a marathon, but I don't know that I'll have the schedule to properly train for one, ya know? So, in actuality, I'm not going to post my goals, and this whole last paragraph has been a waste! =)

Either way...I wish I had written down what my resolutions for 2005 were because I'd be able to look back and see what good it actually did to set them. Looking back at my old blog ("Strenght Reveals Itself Through Character") I notice that I only had one goal, that I set in March - to join the military by September. Well, I got half of it, so that counts for something right?? I mean, I joined in October. Wasn't TOO far off. Okay...now that I'm rereading some of my old journal entries, I'm almost tempted to post them, but I won't. If you care, you can go and read them. I won't bog you down any further.

Happy New Year and I only wish for y'all that 2006 is better than 2005.

29 December 2005

BLACKJACK!

"It is indispensable to our success in this war that those we ask to fight it know that in the discharge of their dangerous responsibilities to their country they are never expected to forget that they are Americans, and the valiant defenders of a sacred idea of how nations should govern their own affairs and their relations with others - even our enemies.
Those who return to us and those who give their lives for us are entitled to that honor. And those of us who have given them this onerous duty are obliged by our history, and the many terrible sacrifices that have been made in our defense, to make clear to them that they need not risk their or their country's honor to prevail; that they are always - through violence, chaos and heartache of war, through deprivation and cruelty and loss - they are always, always, Americans, and different, better and strong than those who would destroy us."

Senator John McCain


Okay, I'm a dork...I have 21 days left until I'm supposed to ship...hence, the whole blackjack thing...

Anyway...Christmas is done and over with, thankfully...I really hate the holidays...Always kinda have, except when I was a child...They lose their charm after you find out Santa is a hoax...I took some sick kind of pleasure in letting my mom know that this was the last Christmas I would be around for a while...haha...even if I get leave next year, I don't plan on coming back to MI...hell no...haha...Oh well!

So, yeah, I was talking to my friend Erik last night and he asked how I was feeling about leaving soon. For the first time, I could honestly say I wasn't scared or nervous or anything. He was all shocked - "This is a total turnaround from like, a month ago! What gives?!" I told him I knew that I would make it - people have graduated before me and they'll continue to graduate after me. There is nothing about me that will stop me from succeeding in BCT...Besides, after talking to people that are on Exodus right now, I have the feeling that BCT will be easier than trying to understand Greek philosophy...which, I did with flying colors during college. So, now I just kinda feel...nonchalant almost about the whole thing. Some kinda weird, serene peacefulness...Fuck...haha..."calm before the storm" bullshit, probably...

OHH!! On the plus side, it's been hella nice outside, and it's given me a chance to run outside in the mornings!! I've almost had a few stumbles, as the snow hasn't COMPLETELY melted, but nothing too bad...I was so excited about that!! Haha...I am such a nerd...=)

Hope this entry finds you all in good spirits after the holidays and stuff...Happy New Year to y'all...

21 December 2005

Less Than A Month Away

"You're not going to try to simulate a bay in your room are you, high speed?"

My Friend Nichole


So, yeah, I realize that I haven't updated this in a while, and I apologize for those of that care...My life has been quite boring and nothing earth-shattering has happened to make it necessary to post...But, yeah, today sucked.

Went to see my recruiter this morning. He's a good guy, really. But I do not like his boss very much. If I'm not the perfect recruit, he gets all pissy with me. I've spent the last three years dealing with an undiagnosed eating disorder, and he feels it's necessary to constantly barrage me about my weight. I could knock that fucker out if it weren't against some regulation somewhere. My recruiter trusts me to deal with my weight and shit, so he doesn't bug me.

And then there's the whole contract reno issue. I signed the paperwork BEFORE Thanksgiving and NOTHING yet. Not a word. I don't want to ship without that MOS, and I will let the SC know that if he doesn't get his ass on it. I don't want to be a DEP loss as serving my country is something I want more than anything, but I'm not stupid enough to just do whatever...I wish my recruiter were an ass so I wouldn't feel bad about doing it, but he's not, so I haven't said anything yet. But damn, I'm down to 29 (Okay, 28 technically) days before I'm supposed to ship. I don't have time to fuck around with this shit anymore. *sigh*

On a completely different, and somewhat funny note, my work Christmas party was earlier this month and I had to share this picture with y'all...Apparently, I was recruiter by my co-worker's mom to give her husband lessons on proper squat form so he get a better ass...This was the night I realized I had a drinking problem because I don't remember anything after taking a shot of Crown...and this squat lesson apparently falls after that shot, because when my boss showed me the picture, I about died laughing my ass off - "OMG! What the fuck am I doing!?!?" Haha...here y'all go! (Notice I'm proudly sportin' the Army hoodie...)


That's all for now...