Not as Easy as It Looks

This is just the mindless ramblings of a college graduate (double major in political science and criminal justice) and her attempts to join the United States military. You better start here...

27 April 2006

PAIN! IN MY LEGS!!

“I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.”
Carol Leifer


I still hurt. I still cannot get up my stairs in less than a minute...hehe...OW OW OW!! My boss thinks it's hilarious...I oughta beat her. We did chest yesterday...She made me bench 135 for reps...I didn't think I could...I was impressed that I actually could...more than once. I was expecting to not be able to move my upper body today, but I'm okay. I think it's because I actually do strength-train my upper body...just not my legs...ever again. I can't run, I can barely walk. Blah! I had to teach Spin yesterday morning, too. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to. But it actually felt good. I mean, I couldn't feel the pain. Until, of course, I hopped off the bike. Fuck. I want it to go away!!! I didn't go to the gym this morning...I feel guilty, but I think my legs need to rest. I just wanna curl back into bed and sleep...

OH!! MY AVS ARE UP 3-0 TO DALLAS!! AND THE WINGS ARE DOWN 2-1!! Life is good. I love hockey. I think I gotta stop watching it though. I woke up this morning and had to clean up all the empties around my house...hehe...I have over $2.00 in refunds sitting my car now...And it was just Shanny and I...but it was fun. I love hockey. Or as SFC B calls it, "puckyball." =)

Okay...done drinking for a while now...gotta get back on focus...10 May 2006 I'm headed to Illinois to take an IST for the Corps...Gotta get a first-class score...Minimum of 60s flexed-arm hang, 8.5min mile, and 75 crunches...that's the minimum to get the First-Class score...Maximums are 70s flexed-arm hang, 7min. mile, and 100 crunches...Can do. No, no no. Will do.

Time for a nap.

25 April 2006

Perfect!!


"I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out."
Rodney Dangerfield


Oh man, do I ever love this time of the year! Hockey playoffs!! My team, the Avalanche, almost didn't make it. The Avs game that I went to when I was out in Denver was a make-it-or-break-it game for 'em, and luckily they won. They're 7th seed and playing Dallas in the first round. Dallas is a formidable opponent opponent...they are 2nd in the Western Divison after all...Anywayyyy...My Avs are up 2-0...KICK ASS!! And Detroit, the team I HATE the most, are tied with the Oilers (8th seed)...I have a feeling Detroit ain't gonna make it outta the first round...But last night was a good night...Hockey games all over the place...My friend, Shanny (the one I consider responsible for my hockey passion), came over and we watched the Devils-Rangers (4-1), Canucks-Hurricanes (6-5 Double OT), and Avs-Stars (5-4 OT) games (The Sabres also blew away the Flyers, 8-2). It's nice to be able to watch hockey with someone who appreciates the game. Yes, sadly, alcohol was involved, but it's a necessity. Hockey games are best viewed with an alcoholic beverage in hand...It's gonna be a longgggggggg playoff series.

So yesterday, I got my body fat tested again. The last time I had it done was in January. I'm still under 20%, which is all I want right now...Afterwards, my boss and I were talking about ways to lean out my legs. She decided I needed to train them again since I haven't trained them in forever. O...M...G! I cannot move today...It was not fun. Band sqats...TEN sets. We'd do as many reps as possible in 30 seconds, rest a minute, then go again. Did five sets with black bands, then another five with black AND green bands. It wasn't fun. After some more leg work, she decided the best way to finish it up was with walking lunges on the treadmill. FUCK FUCK FUCK! I walked (okay, limped) into the gym this morning ready to attack. If I could have moved. I tried running. Wow. Pain. And for some reason, my shoulder was bugging me, so I asked my other boss if he had some muscle rub. Bad decision. DO NOT accept muscle rub from a powerlifter. Those fuckers use some strong ass shit, lemme tell you! I think I have third degree burns on my shoulder. *sigh*

Anyway...that's really all that's been going on today. OH! Found a reason the Marines might be a tad better than the Army - Marines sponsor a "Player of the Game" in the NHL...Army sponsors a NASCAR car. Hmm...Hockey or NASCAR? HOCKEY!!!

21 April 2006

Oorah??


"Some people live an entire lifetime and wonder if they have ever made a difference in the world, but the Marines don't have that problem."
Ronald Reagan


Okay...so I got some pretty awesome news the other day. Thanks to Ms. KC, I have found a Marine recruiter who is willing to work with me. YAY! With my father being a Marine, my dream has been to follow in his footsteps (as much as he hates it). I've had far too many people tell me I'm more suited for the Corps because of my personality. I was talking to my grandmother once about which service to join and she said Marines. "Look at what it did for your dad." (Mind you, this is my mother's mother, not my father's mother.) My response, "But Twinky, the Marines are hard core." "Chelsea, you're hard core." Do you know what that's like to hear that from your grandmother!? The only reason I haven't pursued that avenue was that there were no recruiters around here that were willing to work with me. Apparently, according to this new recruiter, the Michigan Marine recruiters are all dickheads. Hahah...duh! =) But anyway, this new guy is totally willing to work with me. He said he can me in, even if I'm not at weight, so long as I can basically max an IST (Initial Strength Test). To do that, I need to run 1.5 miles in about 12-13 minutes, do a 70-second flexed arm hang, and 100 crunches in 2 minutes. The run and crunches I'm not worried about...it's the flexed arm hang I'm scared about. I swing too much when I do it, and it makes me lose my grip. I think I'm just gonna work on pullups and lat pulldowns and biceps work to help me. *sigh* Other than that...man, I'm psyched!!! Thanks KC!! Hehe...

OHH! Li'l drama in the blog world...haha. There's a blog, Politics of a Patriot, that I stumbled upon one day. Towards the beginning of her blog, she was sounding a lot like me. Except she's an extreme conservative. To each their own. I'm neither Democrat nor Republican. I align myself with no political party or leaning. I tell people I'm THE MOST apolitical political science student EVER. I'm more concerned with the why of politics, not the what or how. I'm a philosophy student at heart. Anywayyyy...point made: I'm not a Democrat or a Republican or an Independent. Whatever. Moving on. She had an entry that was the same as my adidas quote a few entries ago. I commented on it...and then she attacked me. Haha. "...Maybe you should be thinking about a new diet and exercise program, if your posts on your blog is any indication." When KC came to defend me, Ms. Patriot responded, "And KC, no offense, hon, but if you plan on making it in the Corps, you better start getting in a lot more shape if you think that someone who is too overweight to get in the military is 'more in shape than many of us could hope for.'" It makes me laugh. I could have commented back, but I decided to bring it to my own blog. Apparently, Ms. Patriot has not heard of the concept of 'muscle'. It's cool. I'm sitting at about 18.5% body fat, and AVERAGE for females is 22-25%. But I'm fat. And outta shape. Right? Hahah. Rightttt. I just find it funny. I can almost guarantee her DIs will have a hay day with her...apparently, she doesn't think Marines curse or drink or anything...HAHAHAH! I can only hope I run into her Republican ass in the Fleet. I dunno, maybe it's just me, but I think that in the military, politics become a moot point. I mean, yeah, soldiers and sailors and airmen and Marines and Coasties all have their opinions, but in the end, their job is the same and politics make no difference. I've quoted it before and I'll do it again: "When I serve my country as a soldier, I’m not going to serve her as a Democrat or as a Republican, I’m going to serve her as an American." (Anton Myrer) My Army recruiter LOVES that quote. He gets it. Ms. Patriot will too, someday. Or at least I hope so. I just hope she doesn't take that attitude to OCC or something.

I'm done ranting now. Have a nice weekend, y'all!!


18 April 2006

Who'da Thunk It!?

"Ask not what the government can do for you. Ask why it doesn't."
Gerhard Kocher



Apparently that email I wrote to a coupla people in Congress has been circulating around. I opened my email this morning to find the following email...I don't think 1SG Dunckel knew he had sent it to me...or maybe he did. Either way, the program he's talking about is for the National Guard. What really sucks is I used to have a friend that was a National Guard recruiter...but apparently I am a "selfish little ass" and we haven't talked since. Haha...*sigh*

Sirs,

I laude Ms. Chelsea Rider's interest in military service. Unfortunately for her, the Army does not, and will not use a caliper test to determine body fat. Two regulations, the AR 40-501 (Standards of Medical Fitness) and the AR 600-9 (Army Weight Control Program) determine the only acceptable means of measuring body fat is through a tape test. The max allowable body fat percentage for a female over 40 is 36%. This max allowable decreases in younger age groups, down to a 30% max for 17 - 21 year olds.

There is currently a pilot program underway that will allow applicants to enlist with a maximum of 2% over allowable body fat, if they can pass certain cardiovascular endurance tests. If Ms. Rider wants to call me at the number listed below, I will fill her in.

1SG David Dunckel
State Retention NCO
HHD JFHQ(-) 1SG
"Standards . . . no compromise"


I love the line: "...the Army does not, and will not use a caliper test to determine body fat." Way to be optimistic there, 1SG…hah…*sigh*

17 April 2006

Bored

"Things do not change. We do."
Henry David Thoreau


I was bored and looking through my old pictures on my computer...thought I'd share one...This is a side-by-side of my junior year in high school (1999-2000) and my junior year in college (2003-2004)...



...I miss my piercings and my black hair...Noticably, I never had black hair when I had my piercings...oh well...

15 April 2006

Cracking Like an Easter Egg

“Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”
adidas Commercial


One of my favorite advertising campaigns EVER.

Anyway...I don't know why but these past few months have just been rough as hell. Maybe it's because I didn't ship when I should have and I'm punishing myself for that...Maybe all these years (yes, plural) that I've spent trying to get my 'tape-busting ass' into the military are wearing on me...All I know is that the other day, I was about to crack. I woke up unmotivated to do anything but go back to bed. So I did. I see my reflection and think, "Fuck, I'm not working out hard enough or long enough!" when I know I probably do more in ONE DAY than most people do in a week...heck! A MONTH! I wake up every day wondering where I am in my life and what I'm doing. I started to seriously question my decision to join...

...then I realized that was stupid. The highest goal I have in life is to serve my country. That's ALL I want to do. Okay, okay, not all, but it's the next step in my own plan for myself. Everyone tells me I'm persistent. In fact, my dad told me this morning that he and my boss were talking about just how persistent I am. My boss has told me he admires that in me...My dad and I both know the truth - I'm just too damn stubborn to give up on something. What I'm about to say is going to sound arrogant as hell, but it really shouldn't...I know that there is nothing that life can throw at me that will stop me from accomplishing all I want in life. I know this is because I'm stubborn. I don't give up. Ever. The only thing that will stop me from reaching all my goals (some very lofty ones, at that) is my own death. For example, I have a goal of running both the Dublin and Marine Corps Marathons (not in the same year, because they're held the same day)...Let's say I get sent to Iraq and some IED blows my leg off or I'm shot and have to have it amputated. So? Protesthics work wonders nowadays. I will die having finished a marathon - at any cost. That's just how I am. I refuse to believe that anyTHING or anyONE will stop me.

So what brings about this rant?? A recent email by a dear friend who complimented me, and told me basically to forget what Army regulations say - I am who I am, and I guess who I am happens to be pretty damn good. Blah. I felt I had to explain why I'm often very down on myself...So here is my response:

"...I don't like guys thinking I have all these guys crawling all over me to get a chance with me...I mean, sure, there ARE guys, but hardly any that meet my criteria. I'm not a normal 22-year old female...I have goals and schedules and all this other stuff that most guys can't understand. I hate Michigan and all these guys seem to think they can change my mind and get me to stay and forego what I want in life...Hell, one of my friends today was telling me how in love with me he is and I felt like shit because I had to tell him the feelings weren't the same...He's not going to leave Michigan again (he's a PS Marine)...Seems to think that maybe someday we'll be together, but I just don't see it...Few guys appreciate what I want to do with my life, or understand it...That's why I love talking to you...Sometimes I feel bad because I blab on and on about how fat I am and all that...There are days when I honestly believe it and then days when it's how my recruiter/standards make me feel. I will never be a beanpole, and I don't wish to be...I like looking athletic and not anorexic...Hell, when I was down between 155-165, my dad told me flat out I looked anorexic because my body simply isn't built to be that way...I like lifting weights and running and being active...It's something that, until a few years ago, was NEVER a part of my life...I can remember being younger, like middle school age, and wishing I was smaller so I could someday serve. But did I do anything about it? No. Instead, I ate and ate and ate. I should have spoke up, asked my parents for help or something, but they had another problem to deal with - my sister did, and still does, suffer from depression (and I think a bit of hypochondria) and other afflictions. I've never wanted to be a burden on my parents, and I'd love to get into more detail, but there are things (undiagnosed) that I've dealt with in my life that, had my parents known or pushed for treatment, would DQ me from enlisting. As I've matured, I've outgrown most of that stuff. But I don't think I'll ever have a normal sense of self-esteem until I'm actually doing SOMETHING with my life that I can finally be proud of doing. I mean, I look back at all I've accomplished and think that I HAVE done stuff to be proud of...Hell, at one point I weighed over 250 pounds...I graduated high school third in my class and was given a full-tuition scholarship to school...I managed to get a double major and a minor in FOUR years and keep my grades high enough to allow me to graudate summa cum laude (highest honors)...But none of that, NONE OF IT, can equal the pride I felt that day I raised my hand and took the Oath of Enlistment. I want that feeling back. It kills me that it's so hard. But it's a goal, and I've been raised to always reach my goals, to do what I want because I CAN do it. I know there are a lot of people (my parents included) who don't understand, no matter how much I try to explain it, why I want to serve...why I go through so much to ENLIST. In the ARMY. They all have different plans for me, but none of them are right for what I want. There's a lot I want to do with my life - first and foremost on that list is to serve my country. *sigh*

I think I went off on a tangent there...in fact, I'm not sure if that's even an appropriate response to your email...haha...I guess what I'm getting at is, regardless of what most people will tell me, I still have my past and Army regulations telling me another thing, and it's hard as hell for me to look in the mirror and see what other people see. Instead, I see the girl I used to be or the girl who sits at about 38% body fat, even though I KNOW I'm not at that percentage..."

...I really think I'm out of things to say. Besides, there's a hockey game on TV...and while I'm neither a Flyers nor a Rangers fan, who cares!? IT'S HOCKEY!!

13 April 2006

Back in the Mitten State

"Everyone runs faster with a knife."
FPS Doug, from this great video


I love that video...you should check it out...and yes, I agree - everyone DOES run faster with a knife...

Anyway...I'm now back in Michigan. I must admit, I kinda missed it...I mean, I still HATE it, but I missed my friends. I don't think I actually talked that much out there because there aren't a lot of people for me to talk to. But Colorado is beautiful and I loved the mountains. Granted, as much as I wanted to, I never got my ass OUTSIDE to run...I stuck to the gym. Blah. I feel like such a slacker. A coupla of my friends yelled at me because I was on vacation and apparently you aren't supposed to workout when you're on vacation. Psh. I did. Perhaps the best thing about the whole vacation was this:



I cried when the Avs players skated out on ice. No joke. I'm a dork, I know, but dammit! I LOVE THE COLORADO AVALANCE!! I spent about $50 at the gift shop...haha...My mom kept telling EVERYONE that I was from Michigan, but I hate the Wings and love the Avs...I swear, I musta been their hero or something. It's apparently a cardinal sin to live in MI and hate the Wings, and I'm brave as hell for doing it. Hehe...oh well...I also made my mom take me to the Garden of the Gods, again. I mean, I really just love the mountains. How could anyone NOT?!



So, needless to say, I would not be disappointed if the Army decided to put me at Ft. Carson in Colorado Springs...Speaking of which, the Garden of the Gods is in Colorado Springs...as is the Air Force Academy.



I wanted my mom to stop at one of the exit signs and take a picture, but she wouldn't first of all because I was wearing an Army shirt and secondly, the traffic was crap. *sigh* Oh well! I picked up some Academy postcards at the gift shop for Garden of the Gods and sent one to my Army recruiter. Hehe...Now I just wait for the phone call...

Speaking of the Army recruiter, I went in there yesterday and talked to him and got measured. I added some girth to my forearms, wrists, and neck, but SOMEHOW added 2" to my ass. I don't think that recruiter measured me right, but whatever. Blah. I go back again next Wednesday. My second recruiter was there, and we chatted. This is the guy that gave me the diet that helped me lose 16lbs in two weeks. He's back on it and I told him I was going to start again on Monday. *sigh* I hate this diet, but it's really kinda of my last resort thing. That, combined with three cardio sessions (morning, afternoon, evening - which I can do now that I don't really have a job), should help me get where I need to get ASAP. Although I tend to be cranky and tired on it - but it's understandable when you're averaging less than 1,000 calories a day (I know, I know...it's not the best, but it works!).

Ohhh...one more thing before I stop rambling...during my trip, I had messaged my co-worker on MySpace, and he said something about this girl coming back to work full-time...I was like, "WHAT?" and he said he was just joking, which of course I knew was a lie. So Tuesday, when I went to the gym to teach, she was there and we talked. Apparently no one wanted to tell me that my hours were cut while I was on vacation. Instead, let me come back to 5 hours a week, plus teaching one class. Yay. I was pissed off because there were gyms out in Denver that were hiring and I could have moved there!!! GRRR!! What's best is that even though I've seen my bosses twice since I've been home, NEITHER of them has said anything to me about it. This only makes me want to get my ass outta Michigan and into the Army more. *sigh*

07 April 2006

Oh, wow...

America, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the motherfucking day yeah,
America, FUCK YEAH!
Freedom is the only way yeah,
Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too,
America, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
America, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when we come for you now,
it’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow

Lyrics from the song, "America, Fuck Yeah," from the movie Team America



So yesterday I went to the local 24 Hour Fitness to see if I could work out...had this thing for two weeks free...yay...anyway...I went in the morning and the afternoon (to take a cycling class)...My mom had to drop me off in the afternoon...Oh well...Anyway...as we pulled into the parking lot, these two guys were taking this sign down: "Complimentary Valet." AT A GYM! People are too lazy to walk from the parking lot to the gym. *sigh* It wasn't even a BIG parking lot. And here I was thinking people in Colorado were in better shape...

...Speaking of being in shape, part of this two-week trial membership was an appointment with one of their trainers. That was this morning. So, we go up to her li'l cubicle and start talking. I tell her I plan on joining the military, yadda yadda yadda...She starts telling me everything I already know...So I did the whole, 'nod your head and smile' thing...THEN she wanted to show me stuff to do to lean out my legs...wall squats with a stability ball behind you...yay...I haven't trained my legs in months! MONTHS. The powerlifter in me came out. I went and did my first rep, ass-to-the-grass as proper squat technique dictates, and she yelled at me! "WOAH! TOO FAR DOWN!!" I just kinda rolled my eyes and did them as she told me to. Needless to say, my legs were burning. They're probably growing as we speak...I swear, I walk by a squat rack and my legs grow an inch! *sigh* There's a reason I don't train them, heavy weight or high reps - either way, they GROW! LIKE WEEDS! I don't care what your degree tells you about training, I know my body...She also told me my diet probably wasn't as tuned in as it should be and that I should probably be eating more. Yeah, like that's gonna happen.

Anyway, that's really all that's been going on out here in lovely Colorado. The weather out here reminds me of Michigan...yesterday it was 60s, today it snowed...blah!! It's also been kinda rainy...but it's still beautiful!

05 April 2006

Too Much Caffeine!

"I broke my foot running through a castle."
Some kid at the Detroit airport


So, yeah, I'm in Colorado now...yay...I seriously love this place. I might move out here...I'd love to. Anyway, the plane rides out here were not fun. On the one from Midland to Detroit, there was this girl that was a total sorority chick...and a loud one, too...she was sitting right in front of me and the guy next to me kept making fun of her...It was fun...ha...there was also a crapload of turbulance, which I did not like!! I am not a good flyer...that guy kept laughing at me because I would grap the seat in front of me whenever it got bumpy...then, thanks to my mom's wonderful planning abilities, I had a three-hour layover in Detroit...if you've ever been to the Detroit airport, you'll know how BORED I was...I went to some restaurant and got some food...then I went down to my gate and sat for two hours...fortunately, this cute guy rolled up in a wheelchair and we started talking...he asked to use my phone because there's a transportation strike here in Denver and he wanted to see if he could get a ride...he was telling me about how he graduated recently with a degree in geography (weird...) and had just gotten back from travelling through Europe...and that he broke his foot running through a castle somewhere...he was doing wheelies and shit in the chair and I told him if he fell, I'm sorry, but I would have laughed...hehe...the plane ride from Detroit to Denver was not fun...I had too much caffeine in my system and was sitting in the same spot for three hours...plus, the stupid kid next to me kept elbowing me...I was pretty much already in the aisle, but I kept moving closer and closer...I seriously wanted to beat the living snot of the brat. There was also this cute guy in front of me...he had nice boots. When we were standing at baggage claim, I asked if he was in the military. He was like, "Yeah, why do you ask?" And I told him his boots gave him away. Because I, like the dork I am, was decked out in Army gear, he asked if I was in. I told him I was in the process of joining the Army..."Why not Marines?" I really didn't have a good answer for him. I'm assuming he was a Marine...Then my mom kept yelling at me because I was so freakin' antsy from all the caffeine and shit...and she told me that she did not like my bridge piercing...And she found out I had a tattoo because my sleeves were rolled up far enough to show part of the tattoo on my back...blah! She didn't even help me carry my bags...hah...

...that's really all that's happened so far. It's only 0846 in the morning here...but I think my body is still on Michigan time. I haven't done jack squat yet...I'm gonna go out and walk around my mom's neighborhood here shortly to see if I can rollerblade around...make sure there aren't any hills that are too steep...